A One Act Play

Act I, Scene I

The setting: A normal living room in any middle class home.  Two comfy chairs face a television set.  Slouched down in the chairs are a husband and wife; each with a bowl of cereal; each resting one leg on a shared ottoman.  The wife has her bowl of cereal balanced on her chest.  The husband has his resting on his belly...each spoonful he takes leaves a thin trail of milk leading up to his chin.  When either character speaks, they never look at one other; rather, they keep their eyes focused on the television.  The only sounds are the clink of the spoons and the slurping of milk.  The only light is from the glow of the TV set.

WIFE: Do you want to know one thing I regret about my life?

HUSBAND: What's that?

WIFE: That I never got the chance to try Ecstasy.

HUSBAND (showing no emotion): Huh.

WIFE: Do you know why I think you love me so much?

HUSBAND: Why?

WIFE: 'Cuz you never know what's going to come out of my mouth next.

HUSBAND: This is true.  (pause)  Do you know why I think you love me so much?

WIFE: Sure as hell isn't for the way your ass looks in those pants.

HUSBAND: Nice. You love me 'cuz I'm the best husband in the history of the world and I let you do whatever you want.

WIFE: Not true.  You never let me try ecstasy.

End scene.