Let's Play A Game...

(cue cheezy 60s game show music)

Good afternoon, ladies and germs, and welcome to The Dating Game! Our handsome bachelor, Reggie, has three choices this afternoon so let's get started...

Bachelorette number one has blond hair and likes to giggle!

Bachelorette number two has red hair and likes long walks on the beach!

Bachelorette number three has brown hair and...um...has a very long list of things to describe herself.  Bachelorette #3, you do know this is only a half hour show, right? Oh, well...let's start the description...

Bachelorette #3 (B3) appears normal on the outside to the everyday person, but struggles a great deal on the inside. B3 has a tough time seeing her struggles as an illness and sometimes refuses help when it is being offered to her.  If she had cancer, she wouldn't feel guilty when her parents offer to baby-sit the kids but because it's not cancer, she feels like she's a burden. B3 needs to smarten the fuck up.

B3 has had a tough time blogging about her experiences this past year because of the guilt associated with it. She has been hospitalized due to her impulsivity and depression a total of four times this past year, most recently as December.  B3 doesn't want to come right out and say the words "suicide attempts" because she doesn't like how that sounds.

B3 wants to be clear that she very much wants to be alive.  It's when her OCD mixes with bad thoughts that things start to spiral out of control and she gives in to those bad thoughts.  B3 can be having a great day and all it takes is one wrong turn and BLAMO, enter negative thoughts, enter the spiral, enter access to a shitload of medication and 911 is called again.  B3 would also like to know why the local ambulance centre doesn't have a "Take Three Rides, Get the Fourth One Free" program cuz that shit gets expensive, am I right?

B3 has struggled with finding the right medications over this last year and, as of today, will be starting yet another med. This one is an injectable. In the ass.  B3 can't help but laugh at the idea that her psych nurse is about to get to second base with her and she didn't even have to take her out to dinner.  B3 desperately wants one of these meds to work and wants to be "fixed" because she knows she has children that depend on her and a husband that very much wants her around.  B3 feels like a hostage in her own mind because she doesn't know when the impulsivity is going to kick in and take over.  On a side note, this impulsivity can have positive consequences in terms of shopping and making some fabulous purchases.  But it's also got her into trouble, not just in terms of suicide attempts (but that's a whole other blog post).

B3 really wants 2014 to be a successful year, where she finds the right balance of meds.  But she's afraid that the combination might blunt her out a little and cause her to lose her sense of humour.  Just a minute here...I've just noticed that our Bachelor has left our stage, mumbling something about "crazy ass bitch".  Apparently our Bachelor isn't up-to-date that people with mental illness don't want to be looked at as different and they're not someone to be afraid of (except for the fact they can go all ghetto on yo ass and stab you with a fork for no reason).  But B3 is saying it doesn't matter that the Bachelor left because she already has a loving, supportive, patient husband at home...wait, what? Why the fuck are you on this game show, then? And why are you referring to yourself as a Bachelorette? That's it...I quit this stupid job.

;)