I love New Year's Eve...not so much because of partying (I had my first alcoholic beverage of the year just last night when Mike and I went out for supper), but because I use it as a time to reflect on the year that has passed. I also get excited for the year to come....where will I be by this time next year? What joys will 2015 bring us? What will I have accomplished? What will be the next chapter(s) in the storybook of my life?
In years passed, I've done several blog posts leading up to the New Year which include The Best and The Worst, my goals for the coming year and so on. I'm going to do that all in one post so I'll try to keep it short :)
The Best
- hands down, discovering Thrive. Even though it happened at the end of the year, it has given me my life back. See "The Worst" if you want to know more about what my life was like
- watching Miss K grow into the happy, sociable, lovable, friendly, outgoing, confident little girl that she is. She makes friends wherever she goes! She does get a little bit shy sometimes, but it doesn't take her long to come out of her shell.
- watching Andrew figure out how to walk so that he can discover the world around him. His wee personality is still developing, but so far, he is a curious, independent, happy little man!
- our trips up to Little Bear Lake. Even though there were only a few, we had beautiful weather for each one and got to enjoy lots of beach and water time.
The Worst
- making three separate trips to the psych ward (February, July and November). Enough said.
- struggling with depression, suicidal ideation, OCD and anxiety for a large part of the year
- closing down my store
- Andrew's failure to communicate effectively...still waiting to hear him say "mama"!
What I Learned in 2014
- I learned that I need to put down my phone more often and just be in moment with my children
- I learned that if you want people to pray for you, all you have to do is ask
- I learned that God really does listen and answers your prayers
- I learned that words are the most powerful weapon we have and, if not used carefully, can destroy a relationship with a few simple sentences
- I learned that it sucks to not be forgiven, even when you are really, really sorry and wish you could take back what was said
- I learned that a simple text or message to say "I'm thinking about you" can make a difference in someone's day
What I Hope To Accomplish in 2015
- this is the year I will finally get rid of all this excess weight. I have over 150lbs that I want gone and, with the help of Thrive, will finally do so
- I want to find something else to pour my passion into. Be it crocheting, selling antique items online or Sweet Baby K, I want something that is all mine and that I can be proud of (I've sort of dropped the ball with Sweet Baby K a little bit...haven't been doing much selling or promoting of it)
- I want to cook two new recipes a month
- I want to continue to develop my relationship with God...He and I are really just getting started
- I want to continue being the best mom that I can be...always looking out for the teachable moments, helping shape little lives that will someday grow up to be independent lives and enjoying holding the pudgy little hands that reach up for mine (even if they are covered in jam)
Final Thoughts
As 2014 draws to a close, my final thoughts are bittersweet. It was a hell of a year, but I would not be who or where I am at this moment had I not gone through the trials and tribulations of the previous 365 days. There's still more work to be done in 2015...addictions counselling, group therapy and individual counselling. I'm feeling fantastic, but I know I can feel even more confident and maybe even (dare I say it) proud of myself?
I've read back through previous years' posts at this time (some years there is only one post for all of December) and typically, this time of year isn't very joyous for me (thanks to seasonal affective disorder). I am so, so thankful for Thrive and being given back my clarity of mind. Along with that comes a sense of calmness and along with that comes peace.
Happy New Year, everyone!
Happy New Year!
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